This week, I both gave and received it. This post is about my giving
of it. See, I kinda expected that I'd get it when I did so that's really a whole other topic. But when I gave it . . . well.
I think I pretty much screwed the pooch, so to speak.
I have a friend I would put in his own special category. To put it simply,
we have a complicated and unique relationship, but the bottom line is, I value his friendship and care about him very much.
And this week, though with those two motives sincerely behind my words, I'm afraid that I overstepped. My soap box was just
a little too high.
Maybe none of us really like getting uninvited feedback or unsolicited
advice about how to do or be or live our lives; perhaps we are better at hearing or taking it at certain times than at others.
And that is the first part of what I did totally wrong; I picked a really . . . poor . . . moment to try to make a point.
Kind of making it irrelevant if my point had any validity or not, I'm afraid.
The other thing that was maladept was my choice of delivery - both method
and, if I'm totally honest, wording. I'm not usually so clumsy with either words or with others' feelings, and, quite frankly,
I feel terrible. Timing - word choice - method . . . I'm just hoping he knows me well enough to know that I wasn't trying
to bludgeon him with my point and that, miscommunicated or not, I really did (and do) mean well.
Next time I'm tempted to get on my soap box with anyone - or to give
that unsolicited advice - even if I think they'll be just so very much better for it . . . I'll think twice. Three times if
necessary.
Some days, a good quote gets you through. Maybe it's on one of those
magnets you can get at Paper Affair or Swoozie's - you know, the square ones that have wisdom from Emerson or Goethe and come
in cool colors - or maybe it's a clip from a great article. Today was that kind of a day for me. I thought I would share.
"Boys, this is only a game. It's like life in that you will be dealt
some bad hands. Take each hand, good or bad, and don't whine or complain, but play it out. If you're men enough to do that,
God will help you and you will come out well."
Dwight D. Eisenhower's mother
Food for thought on this rainy, slightly snowy Monday, no? Happy December
to all!
